Uriels Journal

12 Hours of Shame

12 Hours of Shame

There is a guy in Vegas that I know whom I will call Papaburner who once told me, via Facebook, that drama follows me. While I had to get over the initial appalled reaction… it seems to be unfortunately true. I know it’s true. I have this uncanny ability to bring an energy with me that is going to cause a shift in the universe.

Think I am imagining things? Nope. No. Uh-uh. Without a doubt, every person I come to know or become close to, every company, organization … if I become intimately involved with it some great (not great as in good necessarily) change will happen to shake the foundations of it.

har·bin·ger/ˈhärbənjər/

Noun:
  1. A person or thing that announces or signals the approach of another.
  2. A forerunner of something.
Synonyms:
herald – forerunner – precursor – messenger – portent

So I borrowed a Google Search definition of a word that I have associated with myself. Harbinger of Change like some kind of figure from an episode of Supernatural.

Stories in the last 12 Hours

So, I ended up going to bed alone last night because Chantha went to a party his roommates were throwing. Chantha has a problem when it comes to alcohol and he simply does not know when to stop or how to stop. He promised me he would go 3 months without drinking just to prove he could and he has been drunk at least 3 times since.

Well, he ended up staying home last night and called me all fucked up about 1 a.m. at least to tell me he was okay.

I do love this guy and we each have our problems and have been very supportive of each other. It’s been 4 months plus now and I want to keep him. The drinking thing is something I think we need help with.

But that’s not all!!!!! Last night I woke up to piss about 5:30 or so and I hear my 20-something male roommate and 20-something wife of another roommate in the kitchen. male looks around corner nervously. While in toilet hear them go onto back porch sounding like there was some definite flirtations going on.

Just NOT my pace to interfere… right? Not my place to get people to have some sense not to fuck each other …but shit happens.

So by 6:30 20-something girl/wife is crawling into my MY bed telling me she screwed up. She’s all fucked up on some mix of tranquilizers and wine and I figured out much of everything when I head the front door slam as husband left abruptly.

Now, this is not the first time she came crawling into my bed drunk or fucked up or whatever. One night Chantha and I were sleeping and all of a sudden there she was crawling in on top of us.

Chantha is all like… I was naked under the covers …like it was a big deal.

Well, hubby is still out of the house and 20-something male roommate is in his room sleeping. There is a lot to the back-story that does not need to be aired ever, but none the less, in the land of the inappropriate I think we found the epicenter for the morning.

We had a family dinner planned for tonight where all of us and significant others were going to have dinner together, but me thinks that is in the toilet now. So much for that…

 

…so I have been thinking about my next step. Maybe this is part of that message that it is either time to leave or something???? Still not figuring out what the universe is trying to tell me. BUT, me thinks San Francisco is just too hard.

One thought on “12 Hours of Shame

  1. ScottK Post author

    So, I called my friend Perry yesterday in Vegas and asked him … what IF I move back can I crash at his place? It was my first time just acknowledging the possibility. That was before all the drama mentioned above, too.

    I am literally at the end of my rope. I have to let go of some things I a refuse to and I just have to and move on.

    I love Chantha so much. We click on a level I never have with anyone since Adolfo. I don’t want to walk away from that but I will if I have to. So, I am thinking about what to do. Problem is I have absolutely no to little money to work with.

    Anyway… if you got here from the Facebook please feel free to leave your thoughts.

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