I guess there are times when you are faced with the world around you and … well, I seems like with debt and stress one feels 3 feet underground. I have a lot of debt right now and more to come, especially with graduation from school on the horizon… yes the evil student loan. I [...]

Today I am dressed very loudly. Orange and blue… my mohawk is very spiky… I should say my bad mohawk. What’s got me so punked up today? hmmm

damn, I just read through my latest entries… don’t i sound like a sad-sack!

This weekend was a lot about struggling with emotional shit. My mom was put into the hospital on Friday for a clot in her lung and an irregular heart beat. My step brothers and sisters really rallied. They did such an amazing job of coming together that I felt like I let my mom down. [...]

There are days when my self esteem hits the dirt. Tonight I went to Coming Out Day festivities in Las Vegas. It was a nice event, but the headliner had not shown by 10pm and I was over it by that point; it was Ultra Nate. What the hell happened to that career that she [...]

Another weekend past and I am waking up this Monday feeling very reflective. I am deep in my own head again. I feel very lost in where I shold be in life because of some self doubt in so many areas. Funny? I think there is still some of that baggage from when I was [...]

I found this article on gay.com. 99.9% of gay men out there under 40 could never conceive of anything but external gratification of their self-esteem; yes including my past antics. But there are some interesting statements about getting older and body image. Self esteem… all the stuff I am missing. Click to see

On the backside of another weekend, I am feeling very reflective and thoughtful about where I am in life again. Seems like I go through this a lot. I get an eternal message telling me that everything I am doing in life is a waste of time. My work with a web site I have [...]